Burma, great sadness and yet always hope!

Hi you gems

This comes with much love as ever. I will do a posting once a month as I never seem to have time and it has been ages since the last one. Have you noticed mum has purple and baby has green!! Yawning so soon!!!

Since my last posting I have been to Burma for the 6th time and returned last Wednesday after a 6 day visit, but more about that later.

I am still teaching at the same school. Thank you to all those who prayed for the A.S. groups. I cannot remember if I put the results in the last posting so apologies if I did. They got 22 A's, 10 B's and 2 C's and I think about 30 have stayed on for A2. To Him be the glory, certainly in the groups I had and who knows what they would have achieved in 9 months of continuous philosophy teaching instead of 24 hours! I know I am utterly reliant on Him as He knows all the material!! Thank goodness!

This morning on Radio 4 the service was from Calcutta as a tribute to Mother Teresa. It brought back so many memories of being in Calcutta, meeting her, working there and of being utterly transformed and challenged beyond words by the immensity of God's love in action. I was fascinated by her letters which are soon to be published which speak so much of her spiritual darkness. I was particularly struck by the real honesty of the priest who she shared so much with concerning years of spiritual darkness, dryness, lack of joy and not feeling the presence of God. How encouraging for the rest of us and even though the media are making such a thing of it why should it surprise those of us who can share just a fraction of that journey which is not always joy, hope and an overwhelming sense of Himself. I also received a letter from Sister Priscilla who was one of her closest aids a few days ago and we have now been writing for nearly 20 years - amazing!

Most of you will have seen the news on Burma in recent weeks and I have been though every emotion on seeing the pictures, hearing the news etc. About a month ago I spoke in a year 10 assembly, and to the Go Net team at church and then within a few days I gave a 4 minute live interview on a Christian national radio channel on the country, how I got involved, my views etc. I spoke on my mobile at school much to the amusement of some students and staff! The person who is totally unclear in most aspects of her teaching speaking on the radio. What a joke!! I was also involved in one big event in London but did not see myself on television this time!!!

Some of you sad people reading my blog over the months will remember that last December I clearly felt God tell me to wait for another bus and let the next one go whilst in Northwood. You will remember that at the bus stop there was a person from Burma and amazingly I "bumped" into her in the crowd in London which had about 10,ooo of us!!!

So why did I go? Basically I was in church a few weeks ago and saw a video clip from Mission Impossible Three where Tom Cruise jumps off this building ( track 14!). The guy speaking was saying that sometimes God asks us to do the logically impossible and ridiculous and suddenly I thought Lord I think I am meant to go to BURMA! How wacky is that! Two days later I was at the Burmese Embassy in the pouring rain, on the intercom system, praying for wisdom to get them to open the door and found myself using the word grace! I just knew I was meant to go and knew that I was going to get this visa as really felt God was in it. Three days later the visa, ticket etc were mine and those of you who know I am a complete nightmare on big decisions will be amazed by the timing!! One friend over there had told me I was out of my mind but I just knew it was right.

Needless to say it made me incredibly sad and my heart was just so heavy most of the time. This amazing land and these remarkable people that you can see above are having such a terrible time and without going into too much detail because this can be read over there, there is such a lack of hope. It made me think about what my hope is based on and I would be interested to know what you all think of hope. It is crucial to the human spirit and to us as humans. That proverb "hope deferred makes the heart sick" can be so true. I was listening to Mozart's Requiem on the plane coming back along with the Rolling Stones, Bach etc and just thought the Requiem was so apt. Yet Hebrews in the NT says that faith is the evidence of things not seen" Much work is being done e.g. partnersinaction.

Despite what my eyes saw and my ears heard, I believe there is ONE who gives hope. I read a book called Eyewitness to a broken world whilst in Rangoon and one could not have a more apt title!! What a remarkable woman emerges from the pages and having heard her speak three times and met her twice she is a superb role model but she would hate that title!!I am doing an assembly on Burma on Wednesday 14t to the 6th form and staff and it rather feels like being on trial!! It was great to see those amazing friends who know who they are whom I love very much and yet and yet.....!!!I also got into a conversation with an Israeli guy who suggested drinks but did not follow through and two others, but his loss I say and obviously I really believe that!!

On a lighter note I went to the Dorchester today and then out to lunch with Ali and Val those amazing friends who meet me every November and May. We had a brilliant time and the lunch was awesome. I even saw Anthony Hopkins in the foyer of THE DORCHESTER but, as I got his autograph in the 1970's did not ask for it although I would not have minded a picture with him.

Yesterday I went to the Grove and that was pretty amazing too with a sunlit evening, Darjeeling tea etc, very atmospheric and of course wonderful company from someone I had completely mis-judged! They actually have a brilliant sense of humour too, so what more can one wish for!

The Burma assembly went alright and I have had favourable comments, BUT I forgot to say 2 things and that annoyed me! Nevermind.

Today at 7.40 am I walked around the school grounds and with frost on the ground, uplifting music and a clear sky etc there were moments of the numinous, despite the fact I spilt my tea onto my fantastic green mac.

So you gems. I will upload photos later if I do not get time now. I do hope you are all well. Do contact via Facebook if you can, as you know you cannot comment on my blog postings!
I will upload others when I get the chance as I have no adapter and have to keep borrowing one.

I even had BUSINESS cards printed over there with the verse "How great is the love the Father has lavished upon us" with PURPLE writing. How cool or sad am I!
Much love as ever. Fliss xx

PS The school choir are doing Handel's Zadok and a Haydn Te Deum on Tuesday. Awesome!

k